Inviting Painful Emotions

Life is as colorful as we make it; we can be feeling pink one day with our bank balances comfortably settled in the black and the grass seemingly no greener on the other side of the fence. Probably out of the blue, a tiresome treason makes us see the red, turn ashen white and even purple with rage. Yes, controlling our assorted emotions is just as how we sway our brush on the canvas with devotion.

“So in order to control emotions should we invite the throbbing part of it?”

During the states of emotional intensity, we begin to panic. An over rushed of emotions that we will feel this way for the rest of our lives, make our heart sore. This is expressed by thoughts such as

1.     I hate feeling this way.

2.     I wish this feeling would end.

3.     Why do I have to feel like this?

Isn’t it obvious none of us want these painful emotions to pierce through our innocent hearts? But, don’t you want to try something different? Rather than wishing for it to go away at the peak of its intensity, invite them in and reconnoitre them, explore them; are they stagnant or do they have an easy on the eye pattern? Let’s begin these four steps for a better understanding.

1.     Notice the feeling that you are feeling.

Pay attention to your emotional state. If you are irritated, notice it and say it out loud to yourself “I am feeling irritated.” Identifying the feeling is the most rigid part but once that is intertwined then it’s easy to further breathe! Are there any accompanying thoughts along with your emotional state? Such as, blame thoughts “they always get on my nerves” or self-blame thoughts “I am a terrible person.” Heed these thoughts and then pause!

2.     Pause. Breathe.

Take a closer look to deep breathing.

3.     Take a walk into your emotional tune:

Cognizance where the painful emotion is located in your body. Belly? Chest? Throat? Tune into it even more once it has been identified. Does the feeling leave your body tingly or tight?

4.     Stagnant or Moving:

Is the feeling stuck or is it constantly changing and providing a different painful sensation each time? Does it feel graze when it changes from one feeling to another? If the feeling is moving, notice the to and fro of that weak emotion.

When these steps are taken into consideration, it is then we notice our emotional states. These painful emotions aren’t stagnant, they constantly keep moving. They can be dark one minute and light the next, varying in the location of our body. If it feels impossible in the moment to tune into the physical sensations during gut-wrenching situations then, just having the awareness and knowledge that the feeling will change eventually can bring comfort.

“Whatever we plant in our subconscious mind and nourish with repetition and emotion, will one day become a reality.”